it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
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