; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I'm really into asian looking animals
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Randomize
