Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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