I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
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