she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
