Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
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