He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
