I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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