my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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