I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
