My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize
