i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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