All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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