he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Come on in and take your pants off
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