oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
We need to get me chipped asap
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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