I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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