you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
