youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
