listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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