Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
