I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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