this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
