I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
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