You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
The best revenge is premature balding
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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