I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
