I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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