Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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