To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
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