; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I can tuck mytits in my pants
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
