That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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