The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Randomize
