btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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