i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
