There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
bring money and cleavage
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
