He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
