Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize