I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
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