dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
