My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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