He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
He's a Shit stain on my heart
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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