If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
