Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Randomize
