why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
