God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Randomize
