At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Randomize
