he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
