Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
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