It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
