I think im going to throw up on grandma
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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