is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
