so that wasnt chicken after all
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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